Welllll, that was a sucky week

Yep, I said it. Not gonna delete it, because it's how I felt. Partly, I need a regular activity or something on my nights off, WITH PEOPLE, not online or infront of a screen. There was a game night a church on Friday, and that helped a lot.

So maybe I'm not doomed. yet.

Doom, Doom, Doom

Yes, folks, you read right, it's pessimism day here in my head. Why? Let's start with the fact that February s the worst month of the year. The whole Valentine's Day thing is horribly depressing when you're single, with no signs of change. I'm working third shift now, which, while the pay will get me by, the schedule doesn't help anything(10pm- 7am, and that's IF we get to leave on time). Also, I seem to be in a social void now, a black hole, if you will. I certainly will. I can't get to sleep until 9am at the earliest, and don't get up before 7pm.

I am doomed. I don't want to become an ancient, single Christian man. Life's too lonely. I can't get through alone.

A Poem I DID NOT write

In fact, this was written by Andrew Marvell(1621-1678):

The Fair Singer
To make a final conquest of all me,
Love did compose so sweet an enemy,
in whom both beautiestomy deathagree,
Joining themselves in fatal harmony;
That while she with her eyes my heart does bind,
She with her voice might captivate my mind.

I could have fled from one but singly fair:
My disentangled soul itself might save,
Breaking the curl-ed trammels of her hair.
But how should I avoid to be her slave,
Whose subtle art can invisibly wreathe
My fetters of the very air I breathe?

It had been easy fighting in some plain,
Where victory might hang in equal choice,
But all resistance against her is vain,
Who has th' advantage both of eyes and voice,
And all my forces needs must be undone,
She having gain-ed both the wind and sun

Note: the words curl-ed and gain-ed both are published with accents, but I don't know how to do that.

slogging through the mud, or graveyard experience

Well, so far, third shift isn't so bad. Sunday mornings are going to be a slight pain, as I plan on staying up or napping to go to second service. Why? Simply put, most of my friends that I have at church go to second service. So, I'll sleep later on Sunday evenings. I'll be able to make ends meet, and that's my largest concern for now. I'd like to get other concerns, but things seem to happen very slowly in my life.

I'd like to get music going again, but I don't really know where to start. Part of me wants to start writing pracitally, meaning the materials will get used, maybe even with some frequency. Of course, I've never done any real practical writing, so it seems I don't really know where to begin. I need some guidance through the process it seems, and some pushing as well. In writing for church, words would be a great help, as I don't trust my abilities to be both lyricist and composer yet. My lack of practice in any writing also seems to be getting in the way.

At any rate, I live. and God is good.